Gratitude is something felt, observed, and cultivated through the constant effort of noticing. But here is the hard part… the simple act of noticing requires a tremendous amount of space for ourselves and our children to be present. This is much easier said than done. Humans are hardwired to function with a negativity bias. We have to work hard to remember we are no longer in danger of the saber-tooth tiger attacking us. This process takes patience and inspired action. We literally have to work on rewiring our brain. Humans are pretty amazing; after all, metacognition is what sets us apart. So, what really gets in the way…that darn superego.
We own an amazing townhouse in San Rafael where nature is all around us. It is safe, cozy, remodeled, and truly wonderful. Our neighbors are kind and we are minutes away from school. However, for the last few years, I’ve found myself looking at real estate (and even stopping by Open Houses). I dreamed of this home yet found myself constantly dreaming of our next one. A house that’s “better” of course for hosting and without an attached wall. I didn’t even realize that I was driving through neighborhoods with this energy until our oldest daughter said, “Mama, we will be so lucky when we get to have a better house”. She pointed to a bigger one on the street. My heart sank. Here I am, saying be grateful, but my actions are communicating my lack of gratitude and/or not enough-ness. Truth is, there will always be a bigger and better house. Focusing on a better one only robs me of the happiness I could feel for the home we have worked so hard to create. For a moment back in January of 2021…this house was enough.